Vodka is a right, not a priveledge.

Posted: 07/13/2010 in Girl Stuff

I’m typing because I’m avoiding something. You see I’m staring at this packet of wax strips in silent terror of what I must do to myself. Not that, you know, this is any kind of feminist commentary on the pain that women (especially those under construction like myself) must put themselves through for the pleasure of men (especially since I could give a toss about male attention). I will talk about that though, and probably soon.

Anyway, I’m done assembling my Batwoman costume for Pride weekend and want to test drive it, which means that it’s time to wax. I bought a good sized bottle of vodka (Absolut Berri Acai, no less) with this moment in mind as probably any sane person does. Access to vodka in any context where hair removal by any means other than razor and shaving cream is occurring should be a human right guaranteed in the UN declaration that handles that kind of thing. Better yet, the first hair removal product company to seize on the idea of partnering with a decent distillery (Absolut seems the most a propos given the national stereotype of the leggy blonde) to include a $5 coupon towards a two-six will bankrupt their competition in under a year. This is a golden business opportunity, and I’m not even charging for it. Mostly because I’d save a lot of money on booze that way.

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